Understand Your Feelings
The athletes that I've helped overcome the death of a goal often experience the five stages of grief including denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Understand you may or may not go through all of these feelings. You may not go through them in a linear fashion and you may bounce between them before finally accepting and moving on from what has happened.
More: How to Bounce Back From Disappointment
Moving On
All athletes that enter a challenging event sign up for risk. At that event, on that day, you lay it on the line. You cannot cherry-pick the perfect conditions to get a "PR Strava time," you toe the line with everyone else signing up for the risk of being "on" that day and at that time.
You risk a public display of your fitness, or lack thereof. You risk getting whipped by someone that you can regularly beat in the local Wednesday World Championship Group ride or run. Some people on those local rides and runs won't even risk showing up to a group event unless they are race-fit.
You risk having friends and family that have supported you through all that training watch from afar, and you fear you will disappoint them.
Of course, you won't disappoint the good ones, the loyal ones, no matter how you place. Placement is irrelevant. Finish time is irrelevant to those that matter most.
More: Does Your Partner Support Your Training?
There are days you feel invincible and your racing prowess proves it. Congratulations. You'll see it again.
Then there are days that you face the fire-breathing dragon of events, bravely, equipped with your sword and shield. The dragon sucker-punches you in the gut and then kicks you in the groin. You feel as though the course, the race, is mocking you.
You may try to slay that dragon again; maybe not.
It doesn't matter.
Whether it's the same course or a new course, you will sign up for the risk of challenge again.
You're going after challenges that won't drop in your lap. You have enough self-confidence to risk failure in the eyes of others, in your own eyes, again.
Living to the fullest and pushing your own limits is playing to win. "Winning" isn't the podium, it's performing to the limit of your current capability when the world is watching.
Playing not to lose, to avoid risk, doesn't guarantee a no-lose situation and certainly falls short of your personal potential.
This strategy is not for you.
At the end of the day, rest satisfied that you accomplished, or set out to accomplish, what others are unwilling to begin.
You are remarkable.
More: How to Finish Proud
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